I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Randomize