yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
