I didn't shave. On purpose
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
