This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
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That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
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That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
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