I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
