i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Randomize
