my sisters under your porch take her home
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
