Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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