FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
