is your mom at the bar?
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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