like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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