love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Randomize
