U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
