Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize
