u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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