is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
