i would punch a child for taco bell
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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