Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
Who wears a wallet chain?!
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
