Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(864): View more from South Carolina

Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.

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(864): Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie. http://tfl.nu/k7pt

Replies (10) Good night (1575) Bad night (5063)
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(513): View more from Ohio

I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair

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(513): I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair http://tfl.nu/zl2m

Replies (35) Good night (4842) Bad night (922)
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(908): View more from New Jersey

when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.

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(908): when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave. http://tfl.nu/35vg

Replies (26) Good night (1713) Bad night (6457)
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(951): View more from California

Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants

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(951): Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants http://tfl.nu/uwlg

Replies (8) Good night (3442) Bad night (1004)
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(540): View more from Virginia

Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up

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(540): Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up http://tfl.nu/xh5q

Replies (18) Good night (1196) Bad night (2808)
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(604): View more from British Columbia

i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS

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(604): i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS http://tfl.nu/2yyy

Replies (5) Good night (3114) Bad night (1107)
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(708): View more from Illinois

Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....

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(708): Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts.... http://tfl.nu/shwj

Replies (11) Good night (869) Bad night (2572)
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(405): View more from Oklahoma

Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?

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(405): Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it? http://tfl.nu/wmow

Replies (1) Good night (863) Bad night (491)
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(703): View more from Virginia

I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car

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(703): I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car http://tfl.nu/t9eq

Replies (1) Good night (822) Bad night (471)
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(250): View more from British Columbia

Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.

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(250): Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me. http://tfl.nu/kle9

Replies (3) Good night (565) Bad night (912)
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(614): View more from Ohio

When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?

(330): View more from Ohio

Come on... He's just practicing.

(614): View more from Ohio

Ok. That's acceptable.

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(614): When are you going to accept the fact he is gay? (330): Come on... He's just practicing. (614): Ok. That's acceptable. http://tfl.nu/xi9n

Replies (3) Good night (584) Bad night (428)
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(585): View more from New York

You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….

(716): View more from New York

...Then...

(585): View more from New York

Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one

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(585): You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then……. (716): ...Then... (585): Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one http://tfl.nu/7kz2

Replies (0) Good night (843) Bad night (345)
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(206): View more from Washington

I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.

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(206): I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy. http://tfl.nu/7x4i

Replies (2) Good night (754) Bad night (291)
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(415): View more from California

Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?

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(415): Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license? http://tfl.nu/k1wl

Replies (9) Good night (896) Bad night (304)
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(301): View more from Maryland

Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call

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(301): Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call http://tfl.nu/0acs

Replies (2) Good night (472) Bad night (280)

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