I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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