He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
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