she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
