if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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