it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I checked into jail on foursquare
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
