Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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