i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
