I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize