you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
