dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
What a dumb baby whore.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
