Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize