The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
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