Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Randomize
