And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
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