i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
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