I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
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