it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
