No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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