If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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