you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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