Will you blow on my dice?
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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