it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
And my parents said I crawled through the house
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Randomize
