the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
should my penis look like a turkey
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
