after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Randomize
