all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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