Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
We talked him into tasing himself.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize