He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
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