its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Randomize
