Texts From Last Night

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  (313): View more from Michigan

  Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink

  (313): View more from Michigan

  Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver

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  (313): Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink (313): Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver http://tfl.nu/lqre
  Replies (9) Good night (2532) Bad night (661)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"

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  (815): my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway" http://tfl.nu/9cdg
  Replies (36) Good night (3825) Bad night (1060)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.

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  (403): you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned. http://tfl.nu/4rjg
  Replies (14) Good night (3812) Bad night (778)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.

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  (440): Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true. http://tfl.nu/r2p3
  Replies (19) Good night (3617) Bad night (1461)
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday

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  (312): Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday http://tfl.nu/xsly
  Replies (11) Good night (4033) Bad night (1161)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?

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  (303): Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog? http://tfl.nu/kw07
  Replies (13) Good night (1893) Bad night (2775)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.

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  (773): please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes. http://tfl.nu/3kln
  Replies (8) Good night (1297) Bad night (2861)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love

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  (708): we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love http://tfl.nu/30hf
  Replies (17) Good night (6762) Bad night (1067)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.

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  (303): U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up. http://tfl.nu/8u2m
  Replies (3) Good night (1205) Bad night (854)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.

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  (602): They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't. http://tfl.nu/kn7x
  Replies (2) Good night (1181) Bad night (523)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.

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  (816): I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me. http://tfl.nu/6mnq
  Replies (7) Good night (571) Bad night (1038)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.

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  (717): I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets. http://tfl.nu/qvke
  Replies (9) Good night (1931) Bad night (576)
• Favorite

  (319): View more from Iowa

  "Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.

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  (319): "Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits. http://tfl.nu/zmtn
  Replies (12) Good night (584) Bad night (1105)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source

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  (503): i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source http://tfl.nu/1syu
  Replies (0) Good night (604) Bad night (373)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.

  (936): View more from Texas

  I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.

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  (713): So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY. (936): I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating. http://tfl.nu/ukan
  Replies (3) Good night (932) Bad night (419)

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