Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

How was your Memorial Day?

(1-717): View more from Pennsylvania

Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.

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(317): View more from Indiana

and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.

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(+61): View more from Australia

He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(206): View more from Washington

You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.

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(709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.

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(973): View more from New Jersey

Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?

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(843): View more from South Carolina

MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.

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(425): View more from Washington

He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.

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