Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
