Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
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Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
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My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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