she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
your room smells of hookers.
And success
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Randomize
